The only real reason in my mind to go dedicated -- or even VPS which is often as powerful yet cheaper -- is to have FULL control over everything. As such I prefer letting the host bring it up just to the point I can SSH into it (usually I go debian, but freeBSD is also on the table)... and I take EVERYTHING from there.
If the project and/or traffic is big enough to warrant a dedicated, I typically NEED to customize enough of the settings and to have enough control over what is and is not installed from the start. That's part of WHY I would choose one in the first place.
If you're going to put on the big boy pants, do it yourself instead of having mommy help you into them.