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Aren't we all just "objects"?

var me = {
    firstname: "Cagatay",
    surname: "Ulubay",
    birthday: "1990-08-11",
    gender: "male",
    height: "6992px",
    onBoring: function() {
        speakWithYourself();
    },
    skills: [
        "web" => [
            "HTML(5)",
            "CSS(3)",
            "Javascript",
            "PHP",
            "MYSQL",
            "Failed to load additional 5010 skills"
        ]
    ],
    cash: 2147483647,
    onClick: function() {
        pokeback();
    },
    onTickle: function() {
        laugh();
    }
};

return me;